Your browser lacks required capabilities. Please upgrade it or switch to another to continue.
Loading…
<<set $header = 0>>\ <div style="text-align: center;">\ <p class="double">\ <br>CRYPT SHYFTER DINOSAUR WIZARD<br> by kung fu space barbarian<br> </p>\ [[Start|CharCreater]] </div>\ <<set $hp = 10>>\ <<set $sexy = 0>>\ <<set $magic = 0>>\ <<set $sneaky = 0>>\ <<set $beefy = 0>>\ <<set $gold = 15>>\ <<set $pizza = 0>>\ <<set $inventory= []>>\ <<set $inventory.push("Headband")>>\ <<set $header = 1>>\<div style="text-align: center;">\ Are you a dude or a chick?<br> [[Dude|dude]] [[Chick|chick]] </div>\<<set $beefy += 1>>\ <div style="text-align: center;">\ Let's rock and roll!<br> [[Continue|ds]] </div>\<<set $sneaky += 1>>\ <div style="text-align: center;">\ Let's rock and roll!<br> [[Continue|ds]] </div>\<<set $alien = "Vulma">>\ <<set $boygirl = "boy">>\ <div style="text-align: center;">\ Which best describes you?<br> [[Beefy|Beefy]] [[Sneaky|Sneaky]] [[Magical|Magical]] </div>\<<set $alien = "Zalbraak">>\ <<set $boygirl = "girl">>\ <div style="text-align: center;">\ Which best describes you?<br> [[Beefy|Beefy]] [[Sneaky|Sneaky]] [[Magical|Magical]] </div>\You knew it was going to be a long day the moment you saw a T-Rex rip the wings off your spaceship.<br> [[Continue|next1]]HP: $hp SPACEBUCKS: $gold PIZZA: $pizza<br> <u>INVENTORY</u> <<print $inventory.join("\n")>>\<<set $magic += 1>>\ <div style="text-align: center;">\ Let's rock and roll!<br> [[Continue|ds]] </div>\Well, that's not totally true. You already knew it was going to be a long day because your spaceship crashed on this remote planet in the first place. But now's not the time to worry about how you got here- at the moment you need to figure out how you're going to get out of this mess.<br> [[Continue|conte]]As you contemplate your difficult predicament, the T-Rex looks up and spots you. A look of ravenous hunger flashes across the beast's eyes as it begins to stomp towards you. What are you going to do!?<br> [[Obviously I'm going to kill it before it can kill me!]] [[I'm going to tame it and ride it because that would be totally awesome, duh!]]Roll an 11 or higher to kill the T-Rex!<br> [[ROLL|trexkill]]Roll an 11 or higher to tame the T-Rex!<br> [[ROLL|trexkitame]]<<set $roll = random(1,20) + $beefy>>\ <<if $roll gte 11>>\ Your roll: $roll Success!<br> The dinosaur charges forward and tries to gobble you up in a single bite. You are too fast, however, and you dive to the side, scooping up a rock and hurling it directly at the beast's head. The T-Rex roars in a rage and charges at you again.<br> [[Continue|dozenmore]] <<else>>\ <<set $hp -= 3>>\ Your roll: $roll Attempt failed!<br> The dinosaur charges forward and bites your arm! -3 HP.<br> [[Continue|dozenmoreff]] <</if>>\You leap over your wrecked starship and position yourself behind one of the sharpest shards of metal. Before the T-Rex can stop its charge, it lumbers into the shredded metal and eviscerates itself. The mighty dinosaur thrashes in pain, but this only serves to shred the beast's flesh even more. The T-Rex flops over with an agonized growl and dies.<br> [[Continue|deadterk]]<<set $roll = random(1,20) + $magic>>\ <<if $roll gte 11>>\ Your roll: $roll Success!<br> You raise your hands and call out to the T-Rex in a calming voice. You begin to channel your chi energy and allow the forces of the cosmos to flow through you. The T-Rex slows to a stop in front of you and starts sniffing your hair.<br> [[Continue|dozenmorddde]] <<else>>\ <<set $hp -= 3>>\ Your roll: $roll Attempt failed!<br> The dinosaur charges forward and bites your arm! -3 HP.<br> [[Continue|dozenmoreffggg]] <</if>>\You scoop up a rock and hurl it directly at the beast's head. The T-Rex roars in a rage and charges at you again.<br> [[Continue|dozenmore]]Just then you hear a rustling in the trees nearby. Two more mighty dinosaurs emerge from the shadows and approach you. They are followed by several smaller dinosaurs, but it is clear these creatures have not come here to attack you.<br> [[Continue|dkdjgg]]You reach out and touch the monster on the side of its head, focusing all of your magical power into the tips of your fingers. The dinosaur's eyes blink slowly and the look of hunger dissipates, only to be replaced by a look of contentment and trust.<br> [[Continue|teurkg]]Fighting through the pain, you raise your hands and call out to the T-Rex in a calming voice. You begin to channel your chi energy and allow the forces of the cosmos to flow through you. The T-Rex slows to a stop in front of you and starts sniffing your hair.<br> [[Continue|dozenmorddde]]The T-Rex lowers itself to the ground and you swing your leg over its back, climbing up into a seated position like a dino-riding cowboy. The T-Rex rises up onto its hind legs and lets out a mighty roar. You grip your legs tightly against the beast's flanks as the wind blows dramatically through your hair. I gotta admit, you look pretty cool right now.<br> [[Continue|sltigjhg]]Just then you hear a rustling in the trees nearby. Two more mighty dinosaurs emerge from the shadows and approach you. They are followed by several smaller dinosaurs, but it is clear these creatures have not come here to attack you.<br> [[Continue|dkdjgg]]CONGRATULATIONS!<br> You win<<if visited("dozenmore")>>\ RAMPAGE: An'kaja, fellow warrior. One of our scouts claimed he saw you slay the mighty Ikkagu. We could not believe such wild claims, so we had to come and investigate for ourselves. It seems as though his eyes were not deceived! You are indeed a mighty warrior!<br> [[Aw, shucks! You're making me blush!|ikukuk]] [[It was nothing, really. I've slain a hundred beasts bigger than that one during my adventures!|ikukuk]] <<else>>\ RAMPAGE: An'kaja, fellow warrior. One of our scouts claimed he saw you tame the mighty Ikkagu. We could not believe such wild claims, so we had to come and investigate for ourselves. It seems as though his eyes were not deceived! You are indeed a mighty warrior!<br> [[Aw, shucks! You're making me blush!|ikukuk]] [[It was nothing, really. I guess I just have the magic touch.|ikukuk]] <</if>>\<<if visited("dozenmore")>>\ RAMPAGE: Be at peace, warrior! We mean you no harm. One of our scouts claimed he saw you slay the mighty Ikkagu. We could not believe such wild claims, so we had to come and investigate for ourselves. It seems as though his eyes were not deceived! You are indeed a mighty warrior!<br> [[Aw, shucks! You're making me blush!|ikukuk]] [[It was nothing, really. I've slain creatures bigger than that before!|ikukuk]] <<else>>\ RAMPAGE: Be at peace, warrior! We mean you no harm. One of our scouts claimed he saw you tame the mighty Ikkagu. We could not believe such wild claims, so we had to come and investigate for ourselves. It seems as though his eyes were not deceived! You are indeed a mighty warrior!<br> [[Aw, shucks! You're making me blush!|ikukuk]] [[It was nothing, really. I guess I just have the magic touch.|ikukuk]] <</if>>\<<if visited("dozenmore")>>\ RAMPAGE: Allow me to introduce myself. I am Rampage, chieftain of the Dreamstone tribe. This humble valley is our territory.<br> [[Continue|42524w]] <<else>>\ RAMPAGE: Allow me to introduce myself. I am Rampage, chieftain of the Dreamstone tribe. This humble valley is our territory.<br> [[Continue|sldfigu5847]] <</if>>\RAMPAGE: Indeed! Our pizza is made using the finest Fuzonian ingredients. Come! We shall have ourselves a pizza party!<br> [[Continue|gotothevillage]]RAMPAGE: We have excellent builders in our tribe. I will see to it that they begin repairs on your ship immediately.<br> [[Do you guys have pizza? I'm starving!]] [[Thank you, Rampage. Your assistance is greatly appreciated.]]In fact, you are stunned to see that there are people riding on the backs of the dinosaurs! It's a tribe of dinosaur-riding barbarians! What a wonderful planet you've discovered.<br> [[Makanna, friends.]] [[Don't move another step! I'll crack your skulls if you try anything funny!]]<<if visited("dozenmore")>>\ You follow the barbarians to their village. When you arrive, you discover a place of indescribable beauty and wonder. The village is hidden deep within a cluster of blue and orange trees. Glancing up, you are impressed to see that the close-knit tribe keeps their home well defended by guards positioned in the trees.<br> [[Continue|insidetljk]] <<else>>\ You release the tamed Ikkagu back into the wild and follow the barbarians to their village. When you arrive, you discover a place of indescribable beauty and wonder. The village is hidden deep within a cluster of blue and orange trees. Glancing up, you are impressed to see that the close-knit tribe keeps their home well defended by guards positioned in the trees.<br> [[Continue|insidetljk]] <</if>>\The center of the village is a thriving marketplace filled with craftsmen, artisans, and merchants plying their wares.<br> [[Continue|rlsgihigl]]RAMPAGE: Welcome to the village of the Dreamstone Barbarians! Please make yourself at home. Here you will find plenty of supplies and pizza. Feel free to wander around. When you have a moment, come and meet me at the circle of masters. We have a grave issue to discuss.<br> [[Thank you for your hospitality.]] [[I can't stay long, but I appreciate the offer.]]Rampage smiles and wanders off. What will you do?<br> [[Visit the shaman]] [[Head to the blacksmith]] [[Go to the pizza place]] [[Check out the commotion in the center of town]] [[Speak with the circle of masters]]Rampage nods and wanders off. What will you do?<br> [[Visit the shaman]] [[Head to the blacksmith]] [[Go to the pizza place]] [[Check out the commotion in the center of town]] [[Speak with the circle of masters]]SHAMAN: Buy something, will ya?<br> [[Magic book (4 spacebucks)]] [[Voodoo stick (6 spacebucks)]] [[Magic talisman (15 spacebucks)]] [[Leave|town]]BLACKSMITH: Welcome to my shop! How can I help you?<br> [[Moon Dagger (4 spacebucks)|Two daggers (+1 sneakiness), 4gp)]] [[Starsteel Sword (7 spacebucks)|Two-handed sword (+1 beefiness, 8gp)]] [[Laser axe (12 spacebucks)|Battle axe (+2 beefiness, 12gp)]] [[Leave|town]]MARIO THE PIZZA CHEF: Buona sera, my friend! It's-a me: Mario the Pizza Chef! Why don't you order a nice-a slice-a pizza pie?<br> [[Buy pizza]] [[Leave|town]]<<if visited("ksluthg")>>\ Just a bunch of barbarians playing arcade games. Better leave them alone for now.<br> [[Continue|town]] <<else>>\ You see a large cluster of barbarians gathered in the center of the village. They're all cheering and watching some sort of show. As you slide through the crowd and make your way up to the front, you realize they're cheering on someone playing a video game!<br> [[Continue|ksluthg]] <</if>>\You head to the circle of the masters. Seven ancient barbarians sit in a ring of stone rocks and smoke Mar-Ju until their eyes turn white. One of the masters seated near Rampage stands to greet you.<br> [[Continue|lsjlkfgjl]]<<if visited("dozenmore")>>\ You follow the barbarians to their village. When you arrive, you discover a place of indescribable beauty and wonder. The village is hidden deep within a cluster of blue and orange trees. Glancing up, you are impressed to see that the close-knit tribe keeps their home well defended by guards positioned in the trees.<br> [[Continue|insidetljk]] <<else>>\ You release the tamed Ikkagu back into the wild and follow the barbarians to their village. When you arrive, you discover a place of indescribable beauty and wonder. The village is hidden deep within a cluster of blue and orange trees. Glancing up, you are impressed to see that the close-knit tribe keeps their home well defended by guards positioned in the trees.<br> [[Continue|insidetljk]] <</if>>\A Moon Dagger will make you extra sneaky! Buy a Moon Dagger for 4 spacebucks?<br> [[Buy|buydagger]] [[Back|blacksmith2]]A Starsteel Sword will make you a little beefier! Buy a Starsteel Sword for 7 spacebucks?<br> [[Buy|buykatana]] [[Back|blacksmith2]]A Laser Axe will make you extra beefy! Buy a Laser Axe for 12 spacebucks?<br> [[Buy|buyaxe]] [[Back|blacksmith2]]What do you want to do?<br> [[Visit the shaman]] [[Head to the blacksmith]] [[Go to the pizza place]] [[Check out the commotion in the center of town]] [[Speak with the circle of masters]] <<if $pizza gte 1>>\ [[Eat pizza (Restore HP)]] <</if>>\<<if $gold gte 7>>\ <<set $gold -= 7>>\ <<set $inventory.push("Starsteel Sword")>>\ <<set $beefy += 1>>\ You bought a Starsteel Sword. Beefy!<br> [[Back|blacksmith2]] <<else>>\ You don't have enough spacebucks to buy that!<br> [[Back|blacksmith2]] <</if>>\BLACKSMITH: Anything else?<br> [[Moon Dagger (4 spacebucks)|Two daggers (+1 sneakiness), 4gp)]] [[Starsteel Sword (7 spacebucks)|Two-handed sword (+1 beefiness, 8gp)]] [[Laser axe (12 spacebucks)|Battle axe (+2 beefiness, 12gp)]] [[Leave|town]]<<if $gold gte 4>>\ <<set $gold -= 4>>\ <<set $inventory.push("Moon Dagger")>>\ <<set $sneaky += 1>>\ You bought a Moon Dagger. Sneaky!<br> [[Back|blacksmith2]] <<else>>\ You don't have enough spacebucks to buy that!<br> [[Back|blacksmith2]] <</if>>\<<if $gold gte 12>>\ <<set $gold -= 12>>\ <<set $inventory.push("Laser Axe")>>\ <<set $beefy += 2>>\ You bought a Laser Axe. Beefy!<br> [[Back|blacksmith2]] <<else>>\ You don't have enough spacebucks to buy that!<br> [[Back|blacksmith2]] <</if>>\A magic book will make you little bit more magical. Buy a magic book for 4 spacebucks?<br> [[Buy|buybook]] [[Back|shaman2]]A voodoo stick will make you extra magical! Buy a voodoo stick for 6 spacebucks?<br> [[Buy|buystick]] [[Back|shaman2]]A magic talisman will increase all of your stats by 1! Buy a magic talisman for 15 spacebucks?<br> [[Buy|buytalis]] [[Back|shaman2]]<<if $gold gte 4>>\ <<set $gold -= 4>>\ <<set $inventory.push("Magic book")>>\ <<set $magic += 1>>\ You bought a magic book. Hocus pocus!<br> [[Back|shaman2]] <<else>>\ You don't have enough spacebucks to buy that!<br> [[Back|shaman2]] <</if>>\SHAMAN: Buy something, will ya?<br> [[Magic book (4 spacebucks)]] [[Voodoo stick (6 spacebucks)]] [[Magic talisman (15 spacebucks)]] [[Leave|town]]<<if $gold gte 6>>\ <<set $gold -= 6>>\ <<set $inventory.push("Voodoo stick")>>\ <<set $magic += 2>>\ You bought a voodoo stick. Abra kadabra!<br> [[Back|shaman2]] <<else>>\ You don't have enough spacebucks to buy that!<br> [[Back|shaman2]] <</if>>\<<if $gold gte 15>>\ <<set $gold -= 15>>\ <<set $inventory.push("Magic talisman")>>\ <<set $magic += 1>>\ <<set $sneaky += 1>>\ <<set $beefy += 1>>\ You bought a magic talisman. All stats increased by 1!<br> [[Back|shaman2]] <<else>>\ You don't have enough spacebucks to buy that!<br> [[Back|shaman2]] <</if>>\MASTER: Welcome, stranger. We heard of how you dealt with the Ikkagu. We do not normally pester outsiders with our problems, but as you have proved yourself against our most fearsome foe we hoped that you might lend us your aid once again.<br> [[What troubles you?]] [[I would like to know more about your tribe.]]MASTER: Our tribe has coexisted with the dinosaurs of this world for many generations. However, a Shyfter recently arrived on our planet and has been using evil mind-controlling magic on the dinosaurs!<br> [[Continue|ldkjuuhhvgg]]MASTER: Of course. We are the Dreamstone Barbarians. Our ancestors came to this world from a place across the stars. They settled here because of this planet's majestic beauty and abundant minerals. We have learned to coexist with the dinosaurs of this planet, and we have lived in peace and happiness for many years.<br> [[What is this problem you spoke of?]]MASTER: A Shyfter recently arrived on our planet and has been using evil mind-controlling magic on the dinosaurs of this world! He is forcing them to fight in his army, and he plans to use this army to destroy our tribe. The Shyfter calls himself The Dinosaur Wizard.<br> [[Continue|alskdjut335]]<<if visited("dozenmore")>>\ MASTER: You slew the mighty Ikkagu! None since the legendary Iktar has stood against the wrath of the Ikkagu and lived. Your arrival here is not random chance- you have been sent by the gods to aid us!<br> [[I'll help you, but you must see that my ship is repaired in return.]] [[What else can you tell me about this Shyfter?]] <<else>>\ MASTER: You tamed the mighty Ikkagu! None since the legendary Iktar has stood against the wrath of the Ikkagu and lived. Your arrival here is not random chance- you have been sent by the gods to aid us!<br> [[I'll help you, but you must see that my ship is repaired in return.]] [[What else can you tell me about this Shyfter?]] <</if>>\MASTER: Your heart is pure, outsider. We thank you for your assistance in this grave matter, and we will see to it that your ship is repaired by the time you return from this quest!<br> [[Continue|lsjgk]]Standing in the center of the village like a mighty pillar of strength is an arcade machine. Though the village is quaint, this beautiful machine has been well maintained. The electronic beeps and boops elicit cheers of joy from the crowd. You read the words sprawled across the marquee: INFINITY BLASTER 76,000.<br> [[Where did this arcade machine come from?]] [[What game is this?]] [[Goodbye.|town]]The screen flickers to life: READY PLAYER ONE. 8-bit monsters appear on the monitor and you start shooting! Roll a 20 to beat the high score.<br> [[ROLL|thegamem]]BARBARIAN KID: One of the elders found this machine on a crashed Gorlon ship decades ago! Nobody has been able to beat the high score- most say it's an impossible challenge, but we still try every day. Maybe someone will get lucky, right?<br> [[I'd like to play.]] [[What game is this?]] [[Goodbye.|town]]BARBARIAN KID: Infinity Blaster 76,000! It's the coolest game on the planet! Well... to be honest, it's the ONLY game on the planet. But it's still super fun! You shoot the monsters and try to get a high score.<br> [[I'd like to play.]] [[Where did this arcade machine come from?]] [[Goodbye.|town]]You step up to the machine just as one of the little girls loses her last life. She huffs and hands you the gun-shaped controller. One of the nearby barbarians eagerly hands you a quarter, which you insert into the machine.<br> [[Continue|startgame]]<<set $roll = random(1,20)>>\ <<if $roll == 20>>\ Your roll: $roll Success!<br> The barbarian tribe gathers around you in stunned silence as you nail each shot perfectly. You pick up every power-up bonus and kill every monster that appears on screen. After nearly 4 hours of playing, you reach the final screen- you beat the high score!<br> [[Continue|dozffenmore]] <<else>>\ Your roll: $roll Attempt failed!<br> You play for a few minutes, but eventually you run out of lives. You pass the gun controller to one of the kids and move on.<br> [[Continue|town]] <</if>>\The barbarians cheer as you input your initials into the top line of the game: KFSB. A grinning barbarian appears on the screen, but you're pretty sure nobody can see him except you. He winks and suddenly you feel extra awesome- all stats increased by 1!<br> [[Continue|leavethegmgm]] <<set $magic += 1>>\ <<set $sneaky += 1>>\ <<set $beefy += 1>>\Satisfied with your sick gaming skills, you pass the gun controller to one of the kids and move on.<br> [[Continue|town]]MASTER: The Dinosaur Wizard came from a place beyond the stars not more than six moonturns ago. He immediately began to spread his evil throughout the north, corrupting the smaller beasts first before slowly moving up to the mighty Tyrannosaurs and even the Ikkagu.<br> [[Continue|odij23]]MASTER: The Dinosaur Wizard has made his lair in one of the ruined castles far to the north. This ancient structure was once used as an Andraxxan stronghold in their war against the Golgek Armada. The castle is heavily defended by automated defense turrets and powerful dinosaurs, but that's not the worst part...<br> [[Continue|thewordt]]MASTER: We fear that the Shyfter has been implanting dinosaurs with machinery and other unnatural robotic parts. He isn't creating new Shyfters, exactly, but these beasts are very dangerous. Defeating them will be a great challenge.<br> [[Defense turrets and robot dinosaurs? That sounds like my kind of challenge!|o87]] [[I laugh in the face of danger. HAHAHAHA!|o87]]MASTER: I am pleased to see you are up to the task. Now, there are two major ways to get to the Shyfter's castle. The first option is to travel through the Hidden Valley. This valley was once a calm place of tranquility and happiness. However, scouts have reported that a strange sickness has fallen across the valley in recent weeks.<br> [[Continue|sldkjgg]]MASTER: We believe that several planar gateways and warp rifts have opened up within the valley. It is possible that the darkness spreading to the valley is coming through those gateways. If you choose to travel through the Hidden Valley, you must be prepared to battle the evil that has been plaguing that place.<br> [[That doesn't sound so tough. I could help clean up this darkness on my way to kick the Shyfter's butt.|767676]] [[What's option 2? Do I even want to know?|767676]]MASTER: The second options is probably the easier one: you can reach the castle very quickly by air. Though The Dinosaur Wizard has corrupted many of the larger land beasts, he has yet to corrupt the minds of our flying friends. Therefore, you could fly to the castle on the back of a giant pterodactyl. We are great friends with their leader, Shamrock. Which path will you take?<br> [[I will travel through the Hidden Valley.]] [[I will fly to the castle on the back of a pterodactyl.]]MASTER: Very well. Thank you again, outsider. And good luck!<br> [[Continue|leavtheienr]]MASTER: Very well. Thank you again, outsider. And good luck!<br> [[Continue|leavtheienpteror]]You exit the village, propelled by the cheers and thanks of the barbarian tribe. They wish you well and pray for your safe return and victory.<br> [[Continue|tothevlekh]]You walk to the edge of the village, propelled by the cheers and thanks of the barbarian tribe. They wish you well and pray for your safe return and victory. You leap on the back of a mighty pterodactyl and take off, flying high into the brilliant sunlit sky.<br> [[Continue|flkgjlyij]]You spend the rest of the day traveling until finally, just before moonrise, you spot the Hidden Valley. The air here has taken on a hazy quality. Several areas ahead of you appear to be warped, as if you're looking through liquid air. The ground looks like it has been charred by dragon's breath.<br> [[Enter the valley]] [[Camp here for the night]]You soar high into the air and glide through the clouds. The wind rushes through your hair and you're forced to squint as tears begin forming at the corners of your eyes. You fly for nearly an hour before suddenly you are attacked by three giant eagles!<br> [[Continue|ltkrujg]]You head down into the valley. Suddenly the snapping of twigs nearby catches your attention. You duck behind one of the larger trees and squint through the darkness. Three Gorlon hunters are prowling through the woods.<br> [[Continue|gorliongs]]You unpack your gear and set up camp. Tucking yourself away behind a clump of trees, you settle in for the night and go to sleep. You've only just begun to doze off when suddenly the snapping of twigs nearby catches your attention. You duck behind one of the larger trees and squint through the darkness. Three Gorlon hunters are prowling through the woods.<br> [[Continue|gorliongs]]DERPY GORLON: ...and that's how I got that rash.<br> [[Continue|gotsheh]]GORLON TRAPPER: Would somebody please drive rusty nails through my ears? For the love of Myrrth, that is vile. You are forbidden from telling stories ever again.<br> [[Continue|slafjeli]]GORLON LEADER: Would you two shut up! The nest is just up ahead. Well, well, well! Would ya look at that! This planet is full of dinosaurs, just like the boss promised! Those velociraptors will make a fine addition to next week's show in the arena. Dinosaurs fighting unarmed prisoners! Haha! Can you imagine the roar of the crowd when those poor saps are ripped to shreds? We're going to be filthy rich!<br> [[Continue|riche]]You realize the Gorlons are preparing to attack a nest of sleeping raptors. What will you do?<br> [[Stay quiet and watch]] [[Throw rocks at them]]The Gorlons begin shooting the raptors with tranquilizer darts. Realizing they are under attack, the helpless dinosaurs attempt to flee, but it is no use. The Gorlons are skilled hunters and their aim is deadly accurate.<br> [[Continue|deadlktky]]The Gorlons begin shooting the raptors with tranquilizer darts, but just then you start pelting them with rocks! Realizing they are under attack, the Gorlons attempt to flee, but it is no use- they run smack into you!<br> [[Continue|Those Gorlons are as good as dead!]]RAMPAGE: The beast you slew has been a nuisance to our tribe for many years. None but the mightiest of spirits could hope to kill the Ikkagu, but you have proven yourself to be extremely capable. Will you come celebrate with us at the village?<br> [[Do you guys have pizza? I'm starving!]] [[My spaceship crashed into this planet and now I'm stuck here. Do you know where I can get it fixed?]]RAMPAGE: The beast you now ride has been a nuisance to our tribe for many years. None but the mightiest of spirits could hope to tame the Ikkagu, but you have proven yourself to be extremely capable. Will you come celebrate with us at the village?<br> [[Do you guys have pizza? I'm starving!]] [[My spaceship crashed into this planet and now I'm stuck here. Do you know where I can get it fixed?]]MASTER: Please, outsider... will you help us defeat him and save our tribe from annihilation?<br> [[Why do you need my aid? Surely you have warriors who can defeat this Shyfter?]] [[What else can you tell me about this Shyfter?]] [[I'll help you, but you must see that my ship is repaired in return.]]MASTER: He has now amassed a great army and is preparing to attack our village. Without the aid of the dinosaurs we once counted as our friends, our tribe is sure to be completely obliterated.<br> [[Why do you need my aid? Surely you have warriors who can defeat this Shyfter?]] [[I'll help you, but you must see that my ship is repaired in return.]]One of the fleeing raptors falls at your feet. It looks up into your eyes and you suddenly feel its thoughts in your mind!<br> [[Continue|yudhf]]RAPTOR: Please, barbarian, help my people! We mean no harm to anyone... I can't bear the thought of seeing my family forced into slavery by those dreadful monsters!<br> [[Those Gorlons are as good as dead!]] [[I don't usually help telepathic dinosaurs being attacked by aliens, but I guess I can make an exception for you.|Those Gorlons are as good as dead!]]Roll a 13 or higher to defeat the Gorlons!<br> [[Kick their heads off]] [[Unleash a magical fart]]<<set $roll = random(1,20) + $beefy>>\ <<if $roll gte 13>>\ Your roll: $roll Success!<br> You leap out of the bushes and execute a perfect flying tornado kick, knocking off the Gorlons' heads in a whirlwind attack! Blood squirts all over the grass.<br> [[Continue|beartslfkjh]] <<else>>\ <<set $hp -= 3>>\ Your roll: $roll Attempt failed!<br> The Gorlons spot you and slash you with laser blades! -3 HP.<br> [[Continue|dozenmoressffgfgg2]] <</if>>\<<set $roll = random(1,20) + $magic>>\ <<if $roll gte 13>>\ Your roll: $roll Success!<br> You step out of the bushes and start farting. With each powerful toot you shoot bolts of lightning out of your butt! The Gorlons are fried into chunks of sizzling meat.<br> [[Continue|beartslfkjh]] <<else>>\ <<set $hp -= 3>>\ Your roll: $roll Attempt failed!<br> The Gorlons spot you and slash you with laser blades! -3 HP.<br> [[Continue|dozenmoressffgfgg]] <</if>>\You carefully yank the darts out of the raptors' hides and help them to move the Gorlon corpses away from their nest.<br> [[Talk to raptors|gornlsiiflhj]] [[Loot Gorlon bodies]] <<if $pizza gte 1>>\ [[Eat pizza (Restore HP)]] <</if>>\<<if $hp gte 1>>\ You leap away from the aliens and start farting. With each powerful toot you shoot bolts of lightning out of your butt! The Gorlons are fried into chunks of sizzling meat.<br> [[Continue|beartslfkjh]] <<else>>\ You have run out of HP... YOU ARE DEAD! <</if>>\You leap away from the aliens and take a deep breath. Focusing all of your energy, you execute a perfect flying tornado kick, knocking off the Gorlons' heads in a whirlwind attack! Blood squirts all over the grass.<br> [[Continue|beartslfkjh]]RAPTOR: Thank you, barbarian! You have saved my people from a fate worse than death. I will ensure that these planar rifts are closed and my people are safe once more. What can we do to repay you?<br> [[I seek a Shyfter calling himself The Dinosaur Wizard. Do you know where I can find him?|polk]] [[Point me in the direction of the Shyfter's castle.|polk]]RAPTOR: The Shyfter's castle lies to the North! Follow me.<br> [[Continue|toehtlk]]You search the Gorlons for any useful items. You find a set of POWER GAUNTLETS! +1 beefiness.<br> [[Continue|gornlsiiflhj]] <<set $inventory.push("Power Gauntlets")>>\ <<set $beefy += 1>>\The raptor leads you to the base of a towering mountain. You can see an imposing castle sitting high atop the peak.<br> [[Continue|casltke]]Roll a 15 or higher to defeat the eagles!<br> [[Cast a spell to lock their wings in place]] [[Ram into them with the pterodactyl]]<<set $roll = random(1,20) + $magic>>\ <<if $roll gte 15>>\ Your roll: $roll Success!<br> You speak a magic word and suddenly the eagles' wings clamp together. They drop from the sky like rocks and crash into the side of a nearby mountain. You continue on your journey.<br> [[Continue|flyingskj]] <<else>>\ <<set $hp -= 3>>\ Your roll: $roll Attempt failed!<br> The eagles zoom directly at you, catching you off guard. Your mount and the eagles thrash together and get tangled up in each others' claws! You all plummet to the mountains far below and crash into one of the giant nests that has been made there. -3 HP.<br> [[Continue|egnest]] <</if>>\<<set $roll = random(1,20) + $beefy>>\ <<if $roll gte 15>>\ Your roll: $roll Success!<br> You steer the pterodactyl towards the eagles and ram them with your mount's beak. You smash into the eagles one by one until they have all dropped from the sky like rocks and crashed into the side of a nearby mountain. You continue on your journey.<br> [[Continue|flyingskj]] <<else>>\ <<set $hp -= 3>>\ Your roll: $roll Attempt failed!<br> The eagles zoom directly at you, catching you off guard. Your mount and the eagles thrash together and get tangled up in each others' claws! You all plummet to the mountains far below and crash into one of the giant nests that has been made there. -3 HP.<br> [[Continue|egnest]] <</if>>\The rest of the journey is uneventful. The pterodactyl drops you off at the base of a towering mountain. You can see an imposing castle sitting high atop the peak.<br> [[Continue|casltkdded]]<<if $hp gte 1>>\ The eagles rise up once again and prepare to attack, but you hold out your hands and beg them to pause.<br> [[Hold! We have no quarrel with eagles. Why have you attacked us?]] [[Stand down, you filthy brutes, or I'll wring your scrawny necks!]] <<else>>\ You have run out of HP... YOU ARE DEAD! <</if>>\EAGLE KING: You have come to our territory and put our nest in danger. However, it appears that we were too rash in our decision to attack you. You are not our enemy. We thought you were working with The Dinosaur Wizard and his flying sharks. They have been coming to our mountains and plundering our nests.<br> [[I seek The Dinosaur Wizard's castle. I have come to destroy him.]] [[It would seem we have a common enemy, then! It is my quest to kill The Dinosaur Wizard.]]EAGLE KING: You have come to our territory and put our nest in danger. However, it appears that we were too rash in our decision to attack you. You are not our enemy. We thought you were working with The Dinosaur Wizard and his flying sharks. They have been coming to our mountains and plundering our nests.<br> [[I seek The Dinosaur Wizard's castle. I have come to destroy him.]] [[It would seem we have a common enemy, then! It is my quest to kill The Dinosaur Wizard.]]The eagles consider your words carefully. Just then half a dozen metal sharks come flying through the sky directly at the nest! Roll a 13 or higher to defend yourself.<br> [[Headbutt the sharks]] [[Burp magic shockwaves at them]]The eagles consider your words carefully. Just then half a dozen metal sharks come flying through the sky directly at the nest! Roll a 13 or higher to defend yourself.<br> [[Headbutt the sharks]] [[Burp magic shockwaves at them]]<<set $roll = random(1,20) + $beefy>>\ <<if $roll gte 15>>\ Your roll: $roll Success!<br> You join with the eagles and battle the flying metal sharks. Several of the eagles are badly injured, but you destroy the sharks with a series of powerful headbutts, sending them crashing to the valley far below.<br> [[Continue|flyingskjshark]] <<else>>\ <<set $hp -= 3>>\ Your roll: $roll Attempt failed!<br> You join with the eagles and battle the flying metal sharks. Several of the eagles are badly injured, and one of the sharks even slices your belly with its metal fin as it zooms past. -3 HP.<br> [[Continue|egnestsfk1d]] <</if>>\<<set $roll = random(1,20) + $magic>>\ <<if $roll gte 15>>\ Your roll: $roll Success!<br> You join with the eagles and battle the flying metal sharks. Several of the eagles are badly injured, but you destroy the sharks with a series of powerful magic belches, sending them crashing to the valley far below.<br> [[Continue|flyingskjshark]] <<else>>\ <<set $hp -= 3>>\ Your roll: $roll Attempt failed!<br> You join with the eagles and battle the flying metal sharks. Several of the eagles are badly injured, and one of the sharks even slices your belly with its metal fin as it zooms past. -3 HP.<br> [[Continue|egnestsfk1]] <</if>>\You help the eagles remove smoldering chunks of scrap metal from their nest.<br> [[Talk to eagles|gornlsiiflhjeg]] [[Check for dropped loot|lif]] <<if $pizza gte 1>>\ [[Eat pizza (Restore HP)]] <</if>>\<<if $hp gte 1>>\ You brush yourself off and destroy the sharks with a series of powerful magic belches, sending them crashing to the valley far below.<br> [[Continue|flyingskjshark]] <<else>>\ You have run out of HP... YOU ARE DEAD! <</if>>\<<if $hp gte 1>>\ You brush yourself off and destroy the sharks with a series of powerful headbutts, sending them crashing to the valley far below.<br> [[Continue|flyingskjshark]] <<else>>\ You have run out of HP... YOU ARE DEAD! <</if>>\EAGLE: Thank you, barbarian! You have saved my people from a terrible enemy. We would surely have died without your aid. What can we do to repay you?<br> [[I seek The Dinosaur Wizard. Do you know where I can find him?|podlk]] [[Point me in the direction of the Shyfter's castle.|podlk]]You find a MAGIC GIZMO among the scrap metal! +1 magic.<br> [[Continue|gornlsiiflhjeg]] <<set $inventory.push("Magic gizmo")>>\ <<set $magic += 1>>\EAGLE: The Shyfter's castle lies to the North! Follow me.<br> [[Continue|toehtlssk]]One of the eagles leads you to the base of a towering mountain. You can see an imposing castle sitting high atop the peak.<br> [[Continue|casltkdde]]RAPTOR: I will not get any closer than this, but I'm sure you can find your way from here. Thank you, barbarian, and good luck!<br> [[Farewell, my friend.|ddddd]] [[I'm going to kick this Shyfter's butt!|ddddd]]The raptor turns around and heads home. As you examine the area, you notice two possible entrances: you can attempt to climb the mountain and scale the castle walls, or you can enter through one of the sewer tunnels and sneak in underground.<br> [[Climb the mountain and scale the castle walls]] [[Sneak in through the sewer]]Roll a 10 or higher to climb to the top!<br> [[ROLL|climbing]]You climb through one of the sewer entrances. You spend the next several minutes splashing through poopy water and battling against the raging torrent of filth. Just then several giant robotic crocodiles rise up from the goopy brown water and attack!<br> [[Continue|crocfirhg]]EAGLE: I will not get any closer than this, but I'm sure you can find your way from here. Thank you, barbarian, and good luck!<br> [[Farewell, my friend.|ddddd2]] [[I'm going to kick this Shyfter's butt!|ddddd2]]The eagle and your pterodactyl mount turn around and head home. As you examine the area, you notice two possible entrances: you can attempt to climb the mountain and scale the castle walls, or you can enter through one of the sewer tunnels and sneak in underground.<br> [[Climb the mountain and scale the castle walls]] [[Sneak in through the sewer]]PTERODACTYL: I will not get any closer than this, but I'm sure you can find your way from here. Thank you, barbarian, and good luck!<br> [[Farewell, my friend.|ddddd2x]] [[I'm going to kick this Shyfter's butt!|ddddd2x]]The pterodactyl turns around and heads home. As you examine the area, you notice two possible entrances: you can attempt to climb the mountain and scale the castle walls, or you can enter through one of the sewer tunnels and sneak in underground.<br> [[Climb the mountain and scale the castle walls]] [[Sneak in through the sewer]] <<if $pizza gte 1>>\ [[Eat pizza (Restore HP)]] <</if>>\<<set $roll = random(1,20) + $beefy>>\ <<if $roll gte 10>>\ Your roll: $roll Success!<br> You begin climbing hand over hand until at last you reach the top of the castle walls. Several dinosaur robots are patrolling the perimeter. What do you want to do?<br> [[Sneak past them]] [[Kick the stuffing out of them]] [[Shoot them with your chi powers]] <<else>>\ <<set $hp -= 4>>\ Your roll: $roll Attempt failed!<br> You begin climbing hand over hand. Suddenly hidden defense turrets spring out of the walls! You're completely caught off guard, and with nowhere to hide you're blasted with a volley of missiles. -4 HP.<br> [[Continue|egnesdddtsfk1]] <</if>>\Roll a 14 or higher to sneak past them!<br> [[ROLL|sneakuyign]]Roll a 14 or higher to defeat them!<br> [[ROLL|sneakusyign]]Roll a 14 or higher to defeat the robot dinosaurs!<br> [[ROLL|ueyncnkjg]]<<if $hp gte 1>>\ You begin to fall, but at the last second your fingers wrap around a protruding stone. With a herculean effort you yank yourself up and over the top of the wall.<br> [[Continue|theurnfdd]] <<else>>\ You have run out of HP... YOU ARE DEAD! <</if>>\Several dinosaur robots are patrolling the perimeter. What do you want to do?<br> [[Sneak past them]] [[Kick the stuffing out of them]] [[Shoot them with your chi powers]]<<set $roll = random(1,20) + $sneaky>>\ <<if $roll gte 14>>\ Your roll: $roll Success!<br> You slip past the robot dinosaurs with the silence of a rancid fart and enter the main section of the castle completely undetected.<br> [[Continue|maincastle]] <<else>>\ <<set $hp -= 3>>\ Your roll: $roll Attempt failed!<br> You attempt to sneak past the robot dinosaurs but they have thermal sensors! They detect movement and immediately open fire with their tail-mounted machine guns. -3 HP.<br> [[Continue|egnesdddtsfkff1]] <</if>>\The interior of the fortress feels like the set of a crappy science fiction movie. The walls look like they're made of crumbling tin foil and PVC pipes. In the center of the room you see an obnoxiously large throne, and sitting on that throne is a giant Shyfter: The Dinosaur Wizard. The Shyfter is surrounded by robot dinosaurs.<br> [[It's time for your face to make friends with my fist!]] [[What's the difference between a barbarian and a Shyfter?]] <<if $pizza gte 1>>\ [[Eat pizza (Restore HP)]] <</if>>\<<if $hp gte 1>>\ You take cover behind one of the turrets and spin the rocket silos around to point them at the robots. You squeeze the trigger and fire at the dinosaurs, blasting them into oblivion. With the dinosaurs now nothing more than smoldering corpses, you enter the main section of the castle.<br> [[Continue|maincastle]] <<else>>\ You have run out of HP... YOU ARE DEAD! <</if>>\<<set $roll = random(1,20) + $beefy>>\ <<if $roll gte 14>>\ Your roll: $roll Success!<br> You start kicking the stuffing out of one of the dinosaurs, but the others rush to help! They shoot at you with arm-mounted machine guns and rockets. You take cover behind one of the turrets and spin the rocket silos around to point them at the robots. You squeeze the trigger and fire at the dinosaurs, blasting them into oblivion. With the dinosaurs now nothing more than smoldering corpses, you enter the main section of the castle.<br> [[Continue|maincastle]] <<else>>\ <<set $hp -= 3>>\ Your roll: $roll Attempt failed!<br> You attempt to sneak attack the robot dinosaurs but they have thermal sensors! They detect movement and immediately open fire with their tail-mounted machine guns. -3 HP.<br> [[Continue|egnesdddtsfkff1]] <</if>>\<<set $roll = random(1,20) + $magic>>\ <<if $roll gte 14>>\ Your roll: $roll Success!<br> You incinerate one of the dinosaurs with a powerful chi blast, but suddenly the others rush to help! They shoot at you with arm-mounted machine guns and rockets. You take cover behind one of the turrets and spin the rocket silos around to point them at the robots. You squeeze the trigger and fire at the dinosaurs, blasting them into oblivion. With the dinosaurs now nothing more than smoldering corpses, you enter the main section of the castle.<br> [[Continue|maincastle]] <<else>>\ <<set $hp -= 3>>\ Your roll: $roll Attempt failed!<br> You attempt to sneak attack the robot dinosaurs but they have thermal sensors! They detect movement and immediately open fire with their tail-mounted machine guns. -3 HP.<br> [[Continue|egnesdddtsfkff1]] <</if>>\Roll a 14 or higher to defeat the robo-crocs!<br> [[Karate kick the stuffing out of them]] [[Shoot them with magic chi farts]]<<set $roll = random(1,20) + $beefy>>\ <<if $roll gte 14>>\ Your roll: $roll Success!<br> You spin around and fart chi fire at one of the robo-crocs, but the others gang up on you! You leap onto the closest croc's back and grab its arm, pointing the wrist-mounted machine gun at the other robots.<br> [[Continue|wristmounted]] <<else>>\ <<set $hp -= 3>>\ Your roll: $roll Attempt failed!<br> You attempt to fart on the robo-crocs but they have thermal sensors! They detect movement and immediately open fire with their tail-mounted machine guns. -3 HP.<br> [[Continue|egnesdddtsfkff51]] <</if>>\<<set $roll = random(1,20) + $beefy>>\ <<if $roll gte 14>>\ Your roll: $roll Success!<br> You charge forward and start kicking one of the crocs, but the others gang up on you! You leap onto the closest croc's back and grab its arm, pointing the wrist-mounted machine gun at the other robots.<br> [[Continue|wristmounted]] <<else>>\ <<set $hp -= 3>>\ Your roll: $roll Attempt failed!<br> You attempt to sneak attack the robo-crocs but they have thermal sensors! They detect movement and immediately open fire with their tail-mounted machine guns. -3 HP.<br> [[Continue|egnesdddtsfkff51]] <</if>>\You begin to fire the machine gun, blasting away at the robo-crocs and shredding them into Swiss cheese. You then uppercut the croc you've been manipulating, smashing its brains all over the walls. With the robo-crocs defeated, you enter the main section of the castle.<br> [[Continue|maincastle]]<<if $hp gte 1>>\ You leap onto the closest croc's back and grab its arm, pointing the wrist-mounted machine gun at the other robots.<br> [[Continue|wristmounted]] <<else>>\ You have run out of HP... YOU ARE DEAD! <</if>>\THE DINOSAUR WIZARD: Amusing. But alas, barbarian, you are too late! My army of robot dinosaurs has grown in strength and soon I will be able to conquer not only this planet but the entire galaxy!<br> [[You Shyfters are all alike. When will you learn that I will always be there to defeat your mad plots?]] [[Oh, wow! Galactic conquest! How original. What next, are you going to order your minions to attack me before I'm forced to fight you in a final epic duel that decides the fate of the galaxy?]]THE DINOSAUR WIZARD: Shyfters don't have time for jokes. Robot dinosaurs, ATTACK!<br> [[Continue|rollegkjlg]]Roll a 13 or higher to defeat the robot dinosaurs in a super campy sci-fi battle!<br> [[ROLL|ROLL to engage in an epicly campy sci-fi battle]]THE DINOSAUR WIZARD: I don't have time to deal with pestering barbarians. Robot dinosaurs, ATTACK!<br> [[Continue|rollegkjlg]]THE DINOSAUR WIZARD: Um... actually, yes, that was my plan. Robot dinosaurs, ATTACK!<br> [[Continue|rollegkjlg]]<<set $roll = random(1,20) + $beefy>>\ <<if $roll gte 13>>\ Your roll: $roll Success!<br> You battle the robot dinosaurs in a thunderous fight of sci-fi campiness. Tin foil walls are smashed down as you hurl robotic dinosaurs across the room. The beasts shoot rockets and laser beams at you, but you dodge their attacks with a series of unnecessary cartwheels and backflips. Once your over-the-top gymnastics routine is finished, you rip the robots apart with your sweet karate moves. Soon the dinosaurs are nothing more than a pile of scrap metal and broken bones.<br> [[Continue|shyftktt]] <<else>>\ <<set $hp -= 4>>\ Your roll: $roll Attempt failed!<br> You battle the robot dinosaurs in a thunderous fight of sci-fi campiness. Tin foil walls are smashed down as you hurl robotic dinosaurs across the room. Just then the beasts shoot rockets and laser beams at you! -4 HP.<br> [[Continue|egnesdddtsfkui1]] <</if>>\THE DINOSAUR WIZARD: You may have thwarted my evil plans, barbarian, but this will not be the end of me! I will rule this galaxy or see it burned into a pile of space dust!<br> [[Continue|lkduuhv]]<<if $hp gte 1>>\ You scream in a rage and rip the robots apart with your sweet karate moves. Soon the dinosaurs are nothing more than a pile of scrap metal and broken bones.<br> [[Continue|shyftktt]] <<else>>\ You have run out of HP... YOU ARE DEAD! <</if>>\<<set $hp = 10>>\ <<set $pizza -= 1>>\ Pizza time! HP restored.<br> <<return "Back">>A slice of pizza costs 2 spacebucks. Buy pizza?<br> [[Yes.|buyshlfk]] [[No.|noeugj]]MARIO THE PIZZA CHEF: Anything else?<br> [[Buy pizza]] [[Leave|town]]<<if $gold gte 2>>\ <<set $gold -= 2>>\ <<set $pizza += 1>>\ You bought a slice of pizza.<br> [[Continue|chef2]] <<else>>\ You don't have enough spacebucks!<br> [[Continue|chef2]] <</if>>\MARIO THE PIZZA CHEF: Anything else?<br> [[Buy pizza]] [[Leave|town]]<<if visited(">I'm going to tame it and ride it like a total badass, duh!")>>\ Just then the wall smashes in and the mighty Ikkagu roars at your side! The Ikkagu stomps forward, chomps the Shyfter in half, and devours it.<br> [[Continue|thenend]] <<else>>\ The Shyfter picks up one of the fallen laser cannons and attempts to fire it at you, but the cannon explodes in his hands, completely incinerating him!<br> [[Continue|incerjtlkahjdhg]] <</if>>\Your heart swells with happiness at the site of the massive dinosaur. You leap onto the beast's back and raise the Shyfter's fallen sword high above your head as the Ikkagu roars into the night. Epic!<br> [[Continue|sthendng]]You heave a sigh of relief. Your journey has come to an end!<br> [[Continue|sthendng]]MASTER: The Shyfter is forcing them to fight in his army, and he plans to use this army to destroy our tribe. He calls himself The Dinosaur Wizard. Please, outsider... will you help us defeat him and save our tribe from annihilation?<br> [[Why do you need my aid? Surely you have warriors who can defeat this Shyfter?]] [[What else can you tell me about this Shyfter?]] [[I'll help you, but you must see that my ship is repaired in return.]]You have defeated the dreaded Dinosaur Wizard and restored peace to this planet once again. The Dreamstone Barbarians will honor your victory and cheer your deeds until the very heavens themselves echo with the sound of your name. Your story will go down in history, but your tale is not yet complete... for there are more adventures on the horizon in the next action-packed episode of CRYPT SHYFTER!<br> [[THE END!]]<<if $header == 1>>\ <div class="myDiv">\ <span class='no'>\ <div style="text-align: center;">\ <<link "Back">><<run Engine.backward()>><</link>> | <<link "Save">><<script>>UI.saves()<</script>><</link>> | [[Restart][state.restart()]] </div>\ </span>\ </div> <</if>>\<<run UI.restart()>>\ [[Restart][state.restart()]]