# Hercules! — 9 of 16

## Leo Weinreb

Release 1

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Chapter 8 - The Cretan Bull

Riding is an action applying to one thing. Understand "ride [something]" as riding.

Check riding:

if the noun is not a person:

say "You can only do that to something that moves -- this isn't a Disney cartoon!" instead;

else if the noun is vegetarian:

say "Something tells you that you should restrain yourself from attempting to ride [the noun]." instead;

else:

continue the action.

Report riding:

say "You could probably mount the beast if you really wanted to (albeit with a lot of effort and panting), but the poor thing would probably just collapse from exhaustion if you tried. It really is a pitiful creature."

Instead of entering a person:

try riding the noun instead.

The Peloponnesian Shore is southeast of Lerna. "You have reached the southern shore of Greece, a [sand]-covered land with [rocky shoals] near the ocean. Ferries come and go to the island of Crete to the southeast, or you can journey east to the closely-guarded [jungles] of the Amazons. You can also head back to Lerna to the northwest."

The jungles are a backdrop. The jungles are in the Peloponnesian Shore and Amazonia. Understand "jungle" and "greenery" and "creatures" and "wild creatures" and "wild" and "Amazonia" as the jungles. The description of the jungles is "Lush greenery and wild creatures can be seen [if the player is in Amazonia]here[else]in that direction[end if], all protected of course by the Amazon warriors, the bravest soldiers in all of Greece."

The rocky shoals are scenery in the Peloponnesian Shore. Understand "rock" and "rocks" and "hard rocks" and "classic rocks" and "classic" and "hard" as the rocky shoals. The description of the rocky shoals is "They're not hard rocks, more like classic rocks."

The ferries are a backdrop. The ferries are in Crete and the Peloponnesian Shore and Elis and Erytheia. Understand "ship" and "ships" and "boats" and "boat" and "ferries" and "ferry" as the ferries. The description of the ferries is "There are a few ferries here that seem out-of-commission for now and one ferry that is docked and boarding.".

The island is a backdrop. The island is in Crete and the Peloponnesian Shore. Understand "Crete" and "isle" as the island.

Instead of examining the island:

if the player is in Crete:

try looking instead;

else:

say "You can't see Crete from here. You'll have to take a ferry southeast to see it."

Instead of riding the ferries:

try entering the ferries instead.

Instead of taking the ferries:

try entering the ferries instead.

Instead of entering the ferries:

if the player is in Crete or the player is in Elis:

try going northwest instead;

else:

try going southeast instead

The sand is a backdrop. Understand "coarse sand" and "coarse" as the sand. The sand is in the Peloponnesian Shore and the Western Shore and Crete. The description of the sand is "It's just sand."

Instead of taking the sand:

say "No, you already have enough of it annoyingly caught within your socks and shoes."

Crete is southeast of the Peloponnesian Shore. "This is a lovely little beach, with lush [grass farmlands] and [sandy dunes] coming together in harmony. You've heard there's a wild labyrinth to the west or you can go back to the mainland to the northwest.".

The grass farmlands are a backdrop in Crete. The description of the grass farmlands is "The rolling hills are positively idyllic! It's as though they were sculpted by a wizard casting ancient magical spells.". The sandy dunes are a backdrop in Crete. The description of the sandy dunes is "The pristine beaches are positively idyllic! It's as though they were sculpted by a wizard casting ancient magical spells.".

The Cretan Bull is a portable person. The indefinite article of the Cretan Bull is "the". Understand "cataracts" as the Cretan Bull. The description of the Cretan Bull is "A very dull-eyed, plodding creature with cataracts in its eyes from age. You doubt this one will be chasing flags again anytime soon. You pet it briefly and it barely registers your fingers." The Cretan Bull is in Lab3.

The lost-and-found box is a fixed in place container in Lab3. The lost-and-found box is open and unopenable. Understand "large box" and "blue box" and "large blue box" and "large" and "blue" as the lost-and-found box.

Instead of searching the lost-and-found box:

let L be the list of things in the lost-and-found box;

sort L in random order;

say "In the lost-and-found box [if the lost-and-found box contains less than two things]is[else]are[end if] [if the lost-and-found box contains nothing]nothing[else][L with indefinite articles]."

Instead of examining the lost-and-found box:

let L be the list of things in the lost-and-found box;

sort L in random order;

say "It's very large, heavy, blue, and made of metal. Small lettering on the side of the box reads:[line break][line break][italic type]LABYRINTH LOST-AND-FOUND BOX[line break]Courtesy of Hephaestus, Inc, now a proud member of the Frobozz Corporation.[Roman type][paragraph break]In the lost-and-found box [if the lost-and-found box contains less than two things]is[else]are[end if] [if the lost-and-found box contains nothing]nothing[else][L with indefinite articles][end if].".

The map is in the lost-and-found box. The description of the map is "The map keeps changing, but right now it appears to be a very detailed map of the faraway land of [one of]Narnia[or]Middle Earth[or]Earthsea[or]Westeros[or]Azeroth[or]Discworld[or]Oz[or]Fillory[or]Hyrule[or]Prydain[or]Orisha[or]Asgard[or]Amber[or]Tatooine[or]Vulcan[at random]."

The compass is in the lost-and-found box. The description of the compass is "You have no paper that you need to draw circles on, so you can't imagine this will be of much use to you."

The free T-shirt is a wearable thing in the lost-and-found box. The description of the free T-shirt is "A plain white tee with gold and brown lettering. The front of the shirt reads 'I visited the Labyrinth of Crete and got out alive!' The back has a few dried bloodstains dotting the plain white cotton.". Understand "tee" and "shirt" as the free T-shirt.

The GPS tracking device is a thing in the lost-and-found box. The description of the GPS tracking device is "It's out of batteries, so it won't be of much use to you."

The movie reel is a thing in the lost-and-found box. The description of the movie reel is "It's an original copy of Tod Browning's [italic type]London After Midnight[Roman type]."

The parachute is a thing in the lost-and-found box. The description of the parachute is "It's an old parachute with the name 'D. B. Cooper' stitched on the side, along with a picture of famous movie director Tommy Wiseau.".

The broken phaser is a thing in the lost-and-found box. The description of the broken phaser is "It's a blaster like the ones used on [italic type]Star Trek[Roman type], but it doesn't seem to fire. A small sticker on the side reads 'Property of Area 51'."

The old coin of Hades is a thing in the lost-and-found box. The description of the old coin of Hades is "An ancient coin from the Underworld, made of onyx."

Some red rolled-up string is a thing in the lost-and-found box. The description of some red rolled-up string is "A small piece of red thread, all rolled up in a swirl." Understand "thread" as the red rolled-up string. The indefinite article of the red rolled-up string is "some".

Minotaur-string is a truth state that varies. Minotaur-string is false.

Before going to Lab5:

if the player carries the red rolled-up string:

say "[first time]As you make your way in that direction, you notice that the red rolled-up string pulses slightly and turns a duller shade of red. You hear a very faint dial-up tone... perhaps the extensive maze has taken its toll on the magical thread.[only]";

now minotaur-string is true.

Unrolling is an action applying to one thing. Understand "unroll [something preferably held]" and "unwind [something preferably held]" as unrolling.

Check unrolling:

if the noun is not the red rolled-up string:

say "That doesn't need to be unrolled." instead.

After going from Lab3 for the first time:

try looking;

say "Outstanding. Just what every text adventure needs. Another fucking maze.".

Carry out unrolling:

if the player is in Lab3:

say "You unwind a little bit of the red string, and it suddenly comes to life! It wriggles its little body animatedly towards the [if minotaur-string is true]east[else]south[end if] before rolling itself back up again.";

else if the player is in Lab1:

say "You unwind a little bit of the red string, and it suddenly comes to life! It wriggles its little body animatedly towards the [if minotaur-string is true]south[else]east[end if] before rolling itself back up again.";

else if the player is in the Troll Room:

say "You unwind a little bit of the red string, and it suddenly comes to life! It wriggles its little body animatedly towards the bloodstains and deep scratches in a 'wax on/ wax off' motion before rolling itself back up again.";

else if the player is in Lab2:

say "You unwind a little bit of the red string, and it suddenly comes to life! It wriggles its little body animatedly [if minotaur-string is true]towards the west[else]upwards[end if] before rolling itself back up again.";

else if the player is in Lab4:

say "You unwind a little bit of the red string, and it suddenly comes to life! It wriggles its little body animatedly [if minotaur-string is true]upwards[else]towards the west[end if] before rolling itself back up again.";

else if the player is in Lab5:

say "You unwind a little bit of the red string, and it suddenly comes to life! Its little body goes haywire, and it wriggles first to the southwest, north, east, and finally southwest before rolling itself back up again.";

else if the player is in Lab6:

say "You unwind a little bit of the red string, and it suddenly comes to life! Its little body goes haywire, and it wriggles first upwards, downwards, west, and finally east before rolling itself back up again.";

else if the player is in Lab7:

say "You unwind a little bit of the red string, and it suddenly comes to life! Its little body goes haywire, and it wriggles first to the west, east, upwards, and finally south before rolling itself back up again.";

else if the player is in Lab8:

say "You unwind a little bit of the red string, and it suddenly comes to life! Its little body goes haywire, and it wriggles first to the southeast, west, northwest, and finally northeast before rolling itself back up again.";

else if the player is in Lab9:

say "You unwind a little bit of the red string, and it suddenly comes to life! Its little body goes haywire, and it wriggles first to the west, south, southwest, and finally southeast before rolling itself back up again.";

else if the player is in Lab10:

say "You unwind a little bit of the red string, and it suddenly comes to life! Its little body goes haywire, and it wriggles first to the south, northwest, southwest, and finally west before rolling itself back up again.";

else if the player is in Lab11:

say "You unwind a little bit of the red string, and it suddenly comes to life! Its little body goes haywire, and it wriggles first downwards, south, southwest, and finally north before rolling itself back up again.";

else if the player is in Lab12:

say "You unwind a little bit of the red string, and it suddenly comes to life! Its little body goes haywire, and it wriggles first to the west, south, southwest, and finally east before rolling itself back up again.";

else if the player is in Lab13:

say "You unwind a little bit of the red string, and it suddenly comes to life! Its little body goes haywire, and it wriggles first upwards, south, southwest, and finally east before rolling itself back up again.";

else if the player is in Lab14:

say "You unwind a little bit of the red string, and it suddenly comes to life! Its little body goes haywire, and it wriggles first southwest, east, north, and finally downwards before rolling itself back up again.";

else if the player is in Lab15:

say "You unwind a little bit of the red string, and it suddenly comes to life! Its little body goes haywire, and it wriggles first northeast, east, north, and finally northwest before rolling itself back up again.";

else:

say "You unwind a little bit of the red string, and it suddenly comes to life! Its little body does a vibrant dance to the tune of 'Stayin['] Alive' before rolling itself back up again."

Before going west from Crete for the first time:

if the player does not carry the mop:

now the mop is in the lost-and-found box.

Rule for printing the name of the lost-and-found box while not inserting or removing or examining:

say "lost-and-found box";

omit contents in listing.

Understand "pet [person]" as touching.

Instead of throwing the flag at the Cretan Bull:

say "Nothing. Not even a blink. This is one sorry old bull.".

Instead of touching the Cretan Bull:

say "You pet the Cretan Bull. It barely registers your fingers and continues staring at nothing."

Check asking the Cretan Bull about anything:

say "The mute bull ignores you." instead.

Check telling the Cretan Bull about anything:

say "The mute bull ignores you." instead.

Check showing anything to the Cretan Bull:

say "The mute bull ignores you." instead.

Check giving anything to the Cretan Bull:

say "The mute bull ignores you." instead.

Instead of going southeast from the Peloponnesian Shore:

If the score is less than 6:

say "You step onto the dock where a ferry is boarding but are suddenly overcome with a nasty spike of anxiety and vertigo! The thought of being on a boat for that long when you don't even think you need to be heading in that direction just yet is unmanageable.";

else:

say "You quash your fears of seasickness, book a ticket on the ferry, and sail swiftly to...";

continue the action.

Instead of going northwest from Crete:

say "You quash your fears of seasickness, book a ticket on the ferry, and sail swiftly to...";

continue the action.

Instead of taking the Cretan Bull for the first time:

say "You take the rope attached to the dull-eyed bull and begin leading it along. That was easy.";

increase the score by 1;

follow the notify score changes rule;

try requesting the score;

now the player carries the Cretan Bull.

Check taking the Cretan Bull:

if the player carries the Cretan Bull:

say "You already have that.[line break]" instead;

else:

say "You take the rope attached to the dull-eyed bull and begin leading it along.[line break]";

now the player carries the Cretan Bull;

stop the action.

After dropping the Cretan Bull:

say "You drop the rope attached to the dull-eyed bull and leave it be."

test bull with "se/ s/ s/ se/ se/ w/ take bull"

A Labyrinth is a kind of room. The printed name of a Labyrinth is usually "Labyrinth". The description of a Labyrinth is usually "This is a Labyrinth of twisty little passages, all alike.". Lab1, Lab2, Lab3, Lab4, Lab5, Lab6, Lab7, Lab8, Lab9, Lab10, Lab11, Lab12, Lab13, Lab14, Lab15, and Lab16 are Labyrinths.

A Dead End is a kind of room. The printed name of a Dead End is usually "Dead End". The description of a Dead End is usually "You have come to a dead end in the Labyrinth.". DE1, DE2, DE3, and DE4 are Dead Ends.

Lab3 is west of Crete. Nothing is west of Lab3. Lab1 is north of Lab1. Lab3 is south of Lab1. Nothing is north of Lab3. Lab4 is east of Lab3. Lab3 is west of Lab4. Lab2 is west of Lab1. The Troll Room is east of Lab1. Lab4 is west of Lab2. DE1 is east of Lab2. Lab2 is south of DE1. Nothing is west of DE1. Lab2 is down from Lab3. Lab1 is south of Lab3. Lab2 is north of Lab4. Nothing is east of Lab4. Lab5 is up from Lab4. The skeleton key is a thing in Lab5. The description of the skeleton key is "A large key with a skull and crossbones emblazoned on its face. There is a small inscription too (a poem?) written on the wide face of the key in strange lettering. It reads:[paragraph break][italic type]I shall tell you of a heX[line break]You cannot live without[line break]through storms and blizZards it was said[line break]by wiZards and bY scouts[Roman type]". DE2 is east of Lab5. Nothing is up from Lab5. Lab4 is north of Lab5. Nothing is south of Lab4. Lab6 is southwest of Lab5. Nothing is northeast of Lab6. Lab6 is west of Lab6. Lab7 is east of Lab6. Lab5 is down from Lab6. Lab8 is east of Lab7. Lab8 is west of Lab8. Lab7 is northeast of Lab8. Nothing is southwest of Lab7. DE3 is southeast of Lab8. Nothing is northwest of DE3. Lab8 is north of DE3. Lab9 is south of Lab7. "This is a maze of twisty little passages, all alike.[if the player carries the lion pelt or the player wears the lion pelt][paragraph break]Your lion's pelt claws begin to glow with a soft blue glow.[end if]". Nothing is north of Lab9. Lab7 is south of Lab9. Nothing is north of Lab7. Lab10 is west of Lab9. Nothing is east of Lab10. Lab7 is south of Lab10. Lab9 is west of Lab10. Lab10 is northwest of Lab10. Lab11 is up from Lab6. Lab6 is north of Lab11. Lab12 is south of Lab11. Nothing is north of Lab12. Lab15 is west of Lab12. Lab13 is south of Lab12. Lab11 is east of Lab12. Lab11 is east of Lab13. Nothing is north of Lab13. Lab15 is up from Lab13. Lab12 is northwest of Lab15. Lab15 is down from Lab11. Nothing is up from Lab15. Lab14 is west of Lab11. Lab13 is east of Lab11. Lab12 is east of Lab14. Lab5 is down from Lab14. Lab15 is southwest of Lab14. Lab11 is up from Lab14. DE4 is north of Lab14.

Definition: A number is a scorer if the remainder after dividing it by 169 is 0.

Zorkcount is a number that varies. Zorkcount is initially 0.

Google Zork Increment is a recurring scene. Google Zork Increment begins when the player carries the skeleton key and the player is in a labyrinth.

When Google Zork Increment begins:

increment the zorkcount.

Google Zork is a recurring scene. Google Zork begins when the zorkcount is a scorer and the zorkcount is not 0.

When Google Zork begins:

say "Wandering around the Labyrinth for as long as you have, you are gripped with a sudden sense of ancient familiarity. You have a bizzare urge to 'googleimage zorkmaze1,' which is exceedingly odd, since you have no idea what either of those words mean.".

Definition: A number is triangular if the remainder after dividing it by 3 is 0.

Every turn when the player is in the Troll Room for the first turn:

if the player carries the Cretan Bull:

say "The Cretan Bull ambles up to the bloodstains and starts trying to lick them clean. You think you see the stains stir slightly, but then you blink and they're still.";

else if the Cretan Bull is in the Troll Room:

say "The Cretan Bull ambles up to the bloodstains and starts trying to lick them clean. You think you see the stains stir slightly, but then you blink and they're still.".

Instead of eating the deep scratches:

say "That's not how you clean off bloodstains! Who are you, Edward Cullen?"

Instead of drinking the deep scratches:

say "That's not how you clean off bloodstains! Who are you, Edward Cullen?"

The Troll Room is east of Lab1. "This is a small room with [caved-in rocks] blocking passages to the east and south. The only exit is a forbidding hole leading west. Bloodstains and [deep scratches] (perhaps made by an axe) mar the walls.". Some caved-in rocks are fixed in place things in the troll room. The description of the caved-in rocks is "The rocks are carved with a picture of a laughing man singing 'Trololololol!' How strange...".

Instead of cleaning the caved-in rocks with the mop:

say "'Ow, ow!' the picture on the rock protests. 'Not me you idiot, I'm a carving, not a stain! I'm already as clean as can be!' You stop attempting to clean the caved-in rocks.".

Instead of cleaning the deep scratches with the mop:

say "'Thank you for trying to clean off these walls. We appreciate your patronage,' the picture made by the scratches and stains exclaims with a smile. 'You've won the key to our hearts, which as always lies up above the west south and east. Have a nice day, courtesy of the unionized janitorial Cyclopes of [italic type]Hephaestus, Inc.[Roman type]' You stop attempting to clean the scratches and stains.".

Instead of cleaning the deep scratches with yourself:

say "'Thank you for trying to clean off these walls. We appreciate your patronage,' the picture made by the scratches and stains exclaims with a smile. 'You've won the key to our hearts, which as always lies up above the west south and east. Have a nice day, courtesy of the unionized janitorial Cyclopes of [italic type]Hephaestus, Inc.[Roman type]' You stop attempting to clean the scratches and stains.".

The deep scratches are fixed in place things in the Troll Room. "Bloodstains and deep scratches mar the walls." Understand "bloodstains" and "blood" and "stains" and "stain" as the deep scratches. The description of the deep scratches is "The scratches and bloodstains form a picture of a laughing man singing 'Trololololol!' How strange...".

The Grating Room is northeast of Lab15. "You are in a small room near the Labyrinth. There are twisty passages in the immediate vicinity.[line break]Above you is a [grate] with a skull-and-crossbones lock."

The skeleton key unlocks the grate. Understand "lock" and "skull" and "crossbones" and "skull and crossbones" as the grate. Understand "skull" and "crossbones" and "skull and crossbones" as the key.

The description of the grate is "It has a skull-and-crossbones lock on it."

The Minotaur's Room is southeast of Lab9. "You have come to the very center of the Labyrinth[if hole-created is true], at which lay a ferocious [Minotaur]. All that remains of the beast is the Minotaur-shaped hole in the eastern wall. There is an exit to the northwest, a small [grate] in the corner, and a stairway leading up. [else]. There is an exit to the northwest, a small [grate] in the corner, and a stairway leading up.[end if]".

The Minotaur is a person in the Minotaur's Room. "The Minotaur is here, snarling and stamping its hooves." The description of the Minotaur is "Head of a bull, body of a man. The quintessential Greek monster. Wait, wasn't he killed by someone?"

The grate is up from the Grating Room. The Minotaur's Room is up from the grate. The grate is a door.

The grate is locked.

Instead of throwing the flag at the Minotaur:

say "The Minotaur scoffs at your attempt. 'Like I'm going to fall for that one again!'".

Instead of asking the Minotaur about "Theseus":

try theseusing.

Instead of telling the Minotaur about "Theseus":

try theseusing.

Check asking the Minotaur about anything:

say "The Minotaur roars at you. 'I'm a Minotaur, not a Sphinx!' he bellows." instead.

Check telling the Minotaur about anything:

say "The Minotaur roars at you. 'I'm a Minotaur, not a Muse!' he bellows." instead.

Check giving something to the Minotaur:

say "The Minotaur roars at you. 'I'm a Minotaur, I can't be bribed!' he bellows." instead.

Check showing something to the Minotaur:

say "The Minotaur roars at you. 'I'm a Minotaur, I can't be bribed!' he bellows." instead.

Every turn when the minotaur is in the location and the turn count is triangular:

say "The Minotaur charges at you but you leap aside at the last second, panting for air.".

Instead of going up from the Minotaur's Room:

if the Minotaur is in the Minotaur's Room:

say "The Minotaur roars and blocks your way.";

else:

continue the action.

Instead of going down from the Minotaur's Room:

if the Minotaur is in the Minotaur's Room:

say "The Minotaur growls and blocks your way.";

else:

continue the action.

Hole-created is a truth state that varies. Hole-created is false.

Strange Hallway is a room. "You are walking down a weird, ethereal passageway going from east to west, on both sides of which are Minotaur-shaped holes." Crete is east of the Strange Hallway. The Minotaur's Room is west of the Strange Hallway. Nothing is east of Crete.

The holes are a backdrop. The holes are nowhere. The description of the holes is "[if the player is in the Minotaur's Room]It is[else]They are[end if] Minotaur-shaped."

Understand "hole" as the holes.

Instead of going east from the Minotaur's Room:

if hole-created is false:

say "You can't go that way.";

else:

say "You move down the passage the Minotaur made in the wall to...";

now the player is in the Strange Hallway.

Theseusing is an action applying to nothing. Understand "theseus" as theseusing.

Carry out theseusing:

say "Isn't he a navigator?"

The Holey Area is a region. The Minotaur's Room is in the Holey Area. The Strange Hallway is in the Holey Area

Instead of theseusing:

if the player is in the Minotaur's Room:

if hole-created is false:

say "The Minotaur, hearing the name of its old enemy, crashes through the eastern wall of the room and vanishes from sight.";

now the minotaur is nowhere;

now hole-created is true;

now the holes are in the Holey Area;

else:

continue the action;

else:

continue the action.

The Treasure Room is up from the Minotaur's Room. "No thieves in sight. [first time]All that lies in front of you is a [jewel-encrusted egg].[only]"

The jewel-encrusted egg is a closed openable container in the Treasure Room. The description of the jewel-encrusted egg is "It looks very valuable, and glitters with jewels. It has hinges on the side which makes you think it can be opened." The leaflet is a thing in the jewel-encrusted egg.

Zork-yes is a truth state that varies. Zork-yes is false.

Instead of examining the leaflet:

say "'[bold type]Congratulations![Roman type][line break][line break]If you are reading this message, that means you've travelled through my Labyrinth and beaten my Minotaur. [line break][line break]You might have already realized this if you've gotten this far, but my Labyrinth is based on a maze from one of the first text-based adventure games, Zork I: The Great Underground Empire. Please play that game if you haven't already; it will give you many hours of old-school, frustrated fun. [line break][line break]For completing this bonus puzzle that has absolutely nothing to do with the actual plot of the game, I thank you immensely for wasting your own time and bequeath upon you the highest rank from Zork I, the rank of Master Adventurer, in addition to your previous titles. Try checking your score if you don't believe me. [line break][line break]Please enjoy the rest of the game![line break][line break]Sincerely,[line break]Daedelus, architect of the Labyrinth.'[line break][line break]As soon as you finish reading the strange leaflet, it erupts into blue flames. You give a yelp and drop it, but almost as soon as it hits the ground, it vanishes without a trace. You quickly search your possessions and the surrounding areas and find that the egg has mysteriously vanished as well.";

now the jewel-encrusted egg is nowhere;

now the leaflet is nowhere;

now zork-yes is true.

Test labyrinth with "test lion/ test hydra/ test hind/ test boar/ test stables/ test stymphalia/ test bull"